Domestic Abuse
Domestic abuse means any threats, violence, controlling or coercive behaviour that takes place between family members or people aged over 16 who are in a relationship with each other (or have been in the past).
Family members are defined as mother, father, sister, brother and grandparents; whether directly related, in-laws or step family.
Domestic abuse can happen regardless of social group, class, age, race, disability or sexuality of the individuals involved.
Domestic abuse can affect men, women and those who identify as non-binary. It can occur in any relationship – heterosexual, gay, lesbian, bisexual; young or old.
It is a pattern of behaviour used by abusers designed to establish and maintain power and control over another person.
Break believes that adults and children have a right to live free of fear and abuse. We recognise that some of the families and individuals using our services will have in the past, and some continue to, experience varying levels of domestic violence.
All instances of domestic abuse are treated seriously. While staff will have great concern for the needs of adults who are victims of such abuse, children will always be at the centre of our concern and actions. This means that if there is a conflict of interest between a parent and a child, the interests of the child always come first.
All staff and volunteers receive training in both domestic violence and child protection as appropriate to their role.
Domestic abuse is not always physical violence and can take different forms. This can include but is not limited to the following types of abuse:
- Emotional abuse: persistently putting you down, isolating you from friends and family, name calling, sulking and checking up on you;
- Psychological abuse: verbal abuse, blaming, mind games, criticisms, accusations, emotional abuse, jealous and obsessive behaviour, humiliation, comparisons, manipulation, complete control of a person's life, threats to kill the person or the children, imposed social isolation, sleep deprivation;
- Sexual abuse: forcing you to have sex against your will, sexual assault, forced prostitution, degradation, forced anal or vaginal penetration, using objects, humiliation, forced to watch or act in pornography;
- Financial abuse: preventing a person from getting or keeping a job, taking money, not permitting access to or withholding family income;
- Physical abuse: assault, punches, kicks, hitting, forced imprisonment, biting, strangulation, burning, dragging, actual bodily harm, grievous bodily harm, using weapons, throwing objects;
- This includes so-called honour-based abuse, female genital mutilation (FGM) and forced marriage;
- Controlling behaviour: a range of acts designed to make a person subordinate and/or dependent by isolating them from sources of support, exploiting their resources and capacities for personal gain, depriving them of the means needed for independence, resistance and escape, and regulating their everyday behaviour;
- Coercive behaviour: an act – or a pattern of acts – of assault, threats, humiliation and intimidation, or other abuse that is used to harm, punish or frighten their victim.
There is no single criminal offence of 'domestic abuse' but many forms of domestic abuse are crimes, such as harassment, assault, criminal damage, attempted murder, rape and keeping you locked up in the house. Being assaulted, sexually abused, threatened or harassed by a partner or family member is a crime just as it would be if committed by a stranger.
A new domestic violence law came into effect on 29 December 2015, which recognises that abuse is often a complex and sustained pattern of behaviour intended to create fear. The coercive control offence, which carries a maximum penalty of five years' imprisonment and a fine, can be invoked if on at least two occasions a victim suffers serious alarm or distress that impacts on their day-to-day activities, or they are frightened of physical violence. Read GOV.UK's information about Controlling or coercive behaviour for more information.
It's not always easy to know if a service user is being abused. Abusers may try to persuade a victim that what they are doing is normal, is a sign of love or that they are really sorry. Here are some possible feelings and behaviours that a victim may experience in relation to their abuser:
- You (the victim) are scared of them;
- They (the perpetrator) have hurt, or threatened to hurt, you or people you care about;
- They force you to do things you don't want to do, including sexually;
- They stop you from seeing your friends, family or people who you may go to for advice such as a GP or social worker;
- They have threatened to take your children away or hurt them;
- They prevent you from continuing or starting school, college or from going to work;
- They constantly check up on you or follow you - they may also track you via your mobile phone;
- They wrongly accuse you of flirting or of having affairs on a regular basis;
- They get extremely jealous and possessive;
- They constantly humiliate you or criticise or insult you, often in front of other people;
- You change your behaviour because you're afraid of what they might do or say to you;
- They deliberately destroy things that belong to you;
- They control how much money you have;
- They blame you for the abuse;
- They control your daily routine.
Children in homes where there is domestic abuse are more likely to be abused and/or neglected. Research tells us that most children in these homes know about the violence. Even if a child is not physically harmed, they may have emotional and behaviour problems. Domestic abuse can have an enormous impact on children, whether as witnesses of parental abuse or because of the increased risks of direct abuse to children themselves.
A history of domestic abuse will impact on a family even when the violence has stopped.
Where staff become aware of, or suspect that there might be, domestic abuse within the relationship of a service users, they must discuss these concerns with their line manager. Consideration must be given to making an adult safeguarding referral. Please refer to the Break adult safeguarding procedure for guidance.
If a child is involved in the household where the violence is suspected, action should be taken in accord with the Safeguarding Children guidance.
Staff should support and help the victim to seek help from those agencies who specialise in this work. The Police have specially trained officers who can provide effective intervention and support. There are a number of criminal offences which may be involved in domestic violence – which should be recognised for what they are. In an emergency the Police should be contacted on 999; non-emergencies 101.
Last Updated: July 2, 2024
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